Having a stare down with 15 assembled and primed Grey Knight Terminators should evoke some sense of pride for the Imperium, the fight against heresy, or at very least a humbling respect for the hobby. Alas, all that ran through my narrow minded head was “These little dudes are pretty”. Chastise me as you will, sacrifice me to the Astronomicon or whatever is custom for dealing with ignorant n00bs or ditzy girls, but I at least will own up to what I am. Yes, I am a n00b who just now cracked open a codex to read the rules instead of look at the pictures. Yes, I am a girl. And not one of those cool gamer chicks, either. My room is filled with dolls and stuffed animals that have really stupid peppy, happy names. I wear dresses and heels and gripe about my hair. My car is pink. Yeah, I’m one of those girls. And this girl is now the proud owner of 15 assembled and primed Grey Knight Terminators that now have really stupid peppy, happy names.
This one is Stuart.
Before you launch a rescue mission to save the Knights from their cruel and unusual fate, at least hear me out. I talked this decision out with my friends before debating with myself why I was getting into this hobby. My internal discussion went something like this:
Voice of Reason: 40k is expensive.
Me: *Holding a doll worth half a dime* You shut your whore mouth!
Voice: Do you have any vested interest in this hobby?
Me: Painting and eventually playing. I can learn how to do that…You can teach me how to do that, right?
Voice: *flips me off*
Me: Well fine, I’ve got plenty of guy friends willing to teach me how to play. And I’ll read up on the rules and codex.
Voice: Good idea, heretic. Now are you joining this hobby just to meet guys?
Me: NO!
Voice: *looks at me judgingly*
Me: If you MUST know, I am joining because I need a more social hobby so I’m not walled up in my studio for all eternity.
Voice: *mumbles* Even though the world will greatly benefit from this…
Me: WHAT!
Voice: What if this ends up like your other hobbies? Abandoned and collecting dust?
Me: I don’t just abandon artistic pursuits. My initial passion simply levels out when the high of acquisition settles. I still retain my interest for the hobby, it’s just my inspiration comes in less intense intervals. So while it may seem I have lost the passion of an old hobby for a new venture, the truth is I’m just expanding my interests while retaining the respect for the initial passion. Each hobby bares the knowledge acquired from the last, so to say I have abandoned my pursuits is simply a shallow perception of what actually transpires.
Voice: tl;dr
Me: Screw you, I’m buying the Knights!
Admittedly, my only experience with the 40k universe was two years playing a psyker in a campaign of Dark Heresy where the GM looked over the core book once before throwing it into an obscure corner of the room. I’ve got friends who have tried to spread their addiction to me, but it took a GenCon visit for me to seriously consider getting into painting. Eventually, I was able to sit down during a hobby night and learn some of the finer points of painting. I proceeded to ignore everything they told me about proper priming and detailing and did my own thing. Probably added another heretical crime to my repertoire… The enjoyment I found was what ultimately made me cave and buy the Grey Knights. Stuart up there is my third attempt overall with painting figures. The door soon opened to some local communities where my presence as a girl sparked many playful controversies. My adventures as a girl in 40k are for another day, and adventures they are.
But back to the painting side of things, I’m not sure where it will lead me. All I know is miniatures are the embodiment of my lifetime passion alongside writing. These two things even crossover with my OCs inspiring what I created in mini form. I got into miniature making when I was 12. Through the evolution of 1:12 scale homes and polymer clay sculpting, I found my niche with the obscure and dreadfully expensive ball jointed doll hobby in 2009. You ever see those soul-sucking anime-inspired dolls toted around at cons? Well I took those terrifying dolls and I managed the impossible by making them even creepier. Better yet, I got paid to do it.
AHHH! Kill it with fire before it eats your soul!!!!!
Say what you want about them, but I adore my messed-up dolls. Hell, I adore them enough to overlook their $300+ price tags. My passion for them culminated into accepting commissions in the summer of 2010 and started “Up in the Attic”. It was surprisingly successful and my status rose in the doll community as an up and coming artist…until my situational depression induced a semester long hiatus from the hobby. I have yet to resume significant work thanks to a continuing lack of inspiration, but my hope remains I can still resume with the dolls that once meant so much to me. Part of me entering 40k was in hope of rediscovering my love for miniatures…and finding a “cheaper” hobby. Here’s to hoping, and an entertaining adventure into the 40k realm. *tinks glass of Bailey’s on the rocks and downs it* Now let’s get back to painting this army!
Voice of Reason: Are you drunk AND painting?
And that is what truly lies beneath the shallow exterior of this obnoxious girly girl: the heart of a demented miniature artist pining for an escape.
Yeah, pretty much just like that
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